The Society for the Recapture of Virginity's quick and easy technique for recapturing virginity stands in stark contrast to the methodology used in previous centuries. Historical records of people who have chosen to regain lost purity exist from as far back as the ancient Greeks. Historically, most people trying to GET IT BACK have been women, but there are records of men seeking to recapture their virginity. In ancient times, virginity restoring techniques were crude and caused unnecessary embarrassment. During the Greek and Roman periods of history, midwives would insert perfumed suppositories into women's vaginas, causing the torn hymen to look as if it had never been ruptured.1 This technique was used to salvage the innocence of many women and thereby give them the appearance of purity when they entered into conjugal relations. People of the Medieval era were extremely concerned with the concept of chastity. Due to fear of a disease identified by the scientific community as suffocatio matricis, many women of the Middle Ages used various procedures to recapture their virginity. Suffocatio matricis was thought to cause a malfunction of the sensory system and suffocation in women who had engaged in sexual intercourse and then later practiced a period of abstinence (widows were the most susceptible to this disease). Medics of the time prescribed fumigation remedies much like what the Romans and the Greeks had used. Patients were made to inhale horrid smelling substances, "while aromatic fumigations were applied to the vagina."2 This remedy stopped the deadly suffocation caused by the disease and was typical of methods used to reinstate virginity. This treatment, however uncomfortable, was not as extreme as that used by women attempting to feign chastity on their wedding night. Some had been known to resort to the application of leeches.3 The desire to recapture virginity was also apparent in fiction of the medieval period. The well-known philosopher and doctor, Albert the Great, wrote the tale of a young girl who gave in to lustful desires and then felt stricken with guilt. After attempting suicide three times, the girl resorted to cutting open her own stomach, hoping to rid her body of the lust that was poisoning her. At the moment of laceration, a divine Virgin appeared and proclaimed the girl a virgin once again.4 Although most people seeking to recapture their virginity have been women, men have also sought out renewed chastity. During the 1800's, some cults thought that abstinence could lead to superhuman powers. Young priests went through a purification process after engaging in sexual activity. "Drawing blood, namely out of the ears and lips, the tongue and the sexual organ, which happened with maguey thorns or pieces of reeds, which were pushed through skin and flesh. . . had the meaning of an atonement and torture of that part of the body which had sinned or which appeared to need such asceticism the most."5 These painful acts were meant to reinstate celibacy. In the modern age, ritual purification and certain physical means of recapturing virginity have become increasingly rare. Until now, the only way to recapture one's virginity was through the use of often-painful medical procedures. The Society for the Recapture of Virginity has sought to change all this. Through filling out a simple form, which will be processed by the VRS 3000, you will find your virginity. Fill out the FORM now and become whole again. It's never too late to GET IT BACK!
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